are you crying?

Why are you crying lately most of the time? Where is the love that was so magical now? What has happened to your relationship that you are quarrelling and crying most of the time?

A serious problem may be underlying beneath which if untreated could cause in break of relationship. Lack of understanding between partners could be the first cause. Difference of opinions could cause fights. Remember that marriage is a union, not a platform to debate or argue. Love should be true and unselfish, and then problems will not rise. The basis for arguments is the factor that wants are not satisfied, when wants or desires are not satisfied, then grudges surface and heated words are spoken. Words if blurt out cannot be taken back and will remain in a corner of the mind till it surfaces again in another fight. During such moments, heart aches like never before and a rift occurs mentally. If possible, try to adjust by spending time together and sort out priorities.

Another problem is flirting. The partner’s wayward behavior often destroys a relationship. This kind of situation creates anger and confusion. One way to overcome this phase could be to bring back love instead of giving up. Patience pays, so wait and try to love the partner more and behave as if you are not really affected or bothered by the situation. One of the greatest drawbacks is nagging, if you nag your partner always, then surely he or she will be put off. So do not pester, have a little bit of patience. Remember slow and steady wins the race. If you observe happily married couples of many years, you will see that they complement each other, but this was not achieved in one day.

Try to be realistic in life. Expecting the heaven when you enter into a marriage and then when reality strikes you in the face could upset the mind and sudden outbursts could cause fights. Before committing, it is advisable to have a long talk about life and what both the partners want out of this relationship, whether they are really going to stay put in the marriage or just having a trial and error method. Maturity and love should form the foundation of a marriage, not infatuation or other factors. If both the partners are mature and adjusting, then rest assure the marriage will stand the test of time, no matter what the obstacles might be.

True love means unselfishness. When partners marry, love and not other factors like money or fame should be the criteria. Remember the story of the Gift of the Magi. If true love is present, then flaws will be overlooked and mistakes shall be lovingly corrected.

So be patient, give time and think hard about solutions before leaping to conclusions or decisions. Remember what factors attracted you in the first place and try to bring back the same kind of feelings by spending more time together. Nothing is impossible. Every problem has a solution, try at least a few times to solve any misunderstanding and convince yourself that you can save your relationship. Live happily ever after.

happy married life

 Marriage is commitment

 It makes the heart pleasant

 The lovely bride and her maids

 The flowers in her hands

 And the stars in her eyes

 The smart bridegroom

With apprehension in his eyes

The expectation in the air

The smiles in all faces

Eyes straining to see the lovely pair

The music and the vows

This happy moment

May ever be present

The heart beats of joy and happiness

May ever be there to enjoy

Let not selfishness envelop

Let no grudge be present

Allow not a fight

To sway you out of sight

Truth and courage will lead you

Shove the obstacles with their might

A happily ever after story

Then Cinderella,

Now your story.

I want my honeymoon to stay

Why are we arguing most of the time lately? This is a question most couples ask after a period of honeymoon years. The reasons are really simple once we evaluate them. Falling in ‘love’ is actually a case of infatuation in the case of many people. These people head straight for marriage without really understanding one another properly, and once the honeymoon effect wears off, problems like adjusting to habits and unwelcome friends start to creep in. At first the partner smiles it off, but persistent interference may lead to fights and arguments, leading to divorce and estrangement. Any effort by others to bring such couples together will be futile, unless the persons involved themselves try to adjust and understand the real meaning of LOVE.

LOVE is about

      Sharing

      Caring

      Giving

      Forgiving

      Adjusting

      Rewarding

       Give sole and rapt attention to partner

      Not venting anger on partner

      Partner is not your servant

      Consider partner as your better half

Let me detail. Sharing means no secrets also. Secrets are not present in true love. Secrets means a lie which when revealed could destroy a relationship beyond repair. Why be secretive when your partner has accepted you as their love mate? Surely they will be understanding and supportive and forgive your small mistakes. So go ahead and trust each other and see your love bloom once again. Appreciate the life and chance God has given you and use it properly.

Caring for your partner is the greatest bond that seals your relationship. A partner well cared and loved will NEVER go stray. If you do not give much time or show interest in your partner, then he or she will be extremely sad and offended.

Giving is the word that confirms your good qualities as a human being. Any bad habit or trait will be forgiven if you are truly kind enough to others and have decent manners. Behaving like a gentleman will indeed be appreciated and such a person will be welcome anywhere.

Forgiving is a divine quality which few of us have. To forget and forgive is a hard task which many of us fail to do. But remember that we are also of the same race and we also make mistakes. So please don’t try to keep finding faults and don’t remember grudges of past. If you keep this in mind, you will never have to fight.

Adjusting to one another is the most required factor if you want your marriage to be successful. Remember nobody is perfect, not even you, so please try your maximum to adjust and remember it takes two to maintain a happy married life.

Reward your partner for choosing you above others. How? Signal that your partner is the best in this world. Telling about your love frequently boosts the chemistry between the couple which will seal the marriage. Marriages are meant for a lifetime not just a pastime.

Giving sole and rapt attention to your partner will surely bring you both closer. The feeling of being loved and being considered above all others will act as a super glue which will never let anything rip your relationship apart.

Problems in workplace or any trying situations can be disturbing, but please do not vent your anger on your partner who may not even be aware of your problem. If any situation is getting out of hand, share your apprehension with your partner and get relieved, because marriage is about sharing your happiness as well as sorrows.

Shed off the high and mighty attitude. Nobody is your servant. Everyone is born equal. If you think you deserve rest, your partner also deserves it. Try not to order other people about, because feel blessed that GOD has given us proper limbs to work for us as well as others too. Serve, do not Rule.

Above all consider your partner as your better half and convey so from time to time. Happily married couples of many years reveal this factor as the secret of their long and happy marriage. Human beings feel exalted when praised before others, and if you praise your partner before others, your love will never leave you for another person.

Try to remember these small bits of advice when you feel that your marriage is drifting apart, because small trials and adjustments on your part could save a family and bring smiles. We are humans not birds to keep looking for a new partner every season. Make your life a full time honeymoon. Let the fire never die.

your marriage can be saved

What is the secret of happily married for years, couples? Have you ever wondered?  When you see middle aged or aged pairs in public places who seem to be completely involved in each other, don’t you feel jealous, sometimes? What is the secret behind their happiness?

LOVE and UNSELFISHNESS and complete surrender to each other without any conditions are the main secrets of such happy marriages. The children of such marriages are also happy. This happiness is the result of pure unconditional love. In such families, the children benefit most, because, they are brought up in an environment of love and care and they transmit this love to their partners also.

This happy note was not achieved in one day. It might be the result of years of living together in the most trying times and not calling it quits. Trials and tribulations are part of everyday life. Nobody escapes these phases, but some go on, they do not give up easily. The Never Say Die Spirit dwells in them. That’s the secret behind their happy married life.

The most common mistakes couples make are

• Arguing at the slightest pretext
• Complaining  to their close ones about their partners in their presence
• Being selfish and Egocentric
• Impatient
• Having Minimum Tolerance level
• Not adjusting to partner’s habits
• Not giving Personal space or time to each other [this is the most important point because familiarity breeds contempt even between couples. Don’t always sling on each other’s necks all the time.]
• Finding faults [nobody likes criticism] Read more here…

Causes are many, but do not waste time raking up old stories or fights of the past. Shed your depression. Wake up to the new you and become BOLD and BRAVE. Save your relationship before you are shown the door. This is not what YOU DREAMT. This is not the LIFE you had planned. Revive your love and remember your first meeting. Instead of

remembering your fights try to think and analyze whether you were also at fault, and try to reconcile and approach your partner with true repentance and love[unconditional].See the difference for yourselves. Even the hardest of hearts can be won with love. Take Action NOW and be guided .Life is to be enjoyed, not to be wasted away. Your life is the most precious gift you have. Don’t squander it away on bad habits, and bad gossiping company. Please realize that gossip mongers only help to destroy your precious and happy life of which they are jealous about.

Arise from the ashes and march forward to a new life with your partner. YOU can do it, because all power lies within your self.

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Don't lose

Why cry over the past
When you cannot bring it back
Try to restore, the happiness in your heart
When you were a child, with a  rejoicing heart
Forget the bruises, and spite untold
Gather up your senses
and jump ahead
of all your troubles and problems galore
They won't matter if you ignore
Life is sweet and short too
Each New Year makes us wiser too
So Awake and shed your fear
Gear up to be a winner.

cry not

cry not ,for god is with you
fret not ,for i am with you
think of all the happy moments you had
take a deep breath and relax
close your mind and be silent in your mind
meditate and contemplate
on this beautiful earth
the blessing you are now enjoying 
seeing and enjoying with your eyes
think of those without sight
physical and mental
some may have sight but still do not bend to seek
you will realise how better you are
how you can make the difference
how sane you are
so ,do not fret or regret
get up and move on with a new power.

sweet meet

smile,be angry not
think of all the love in your heart
of those who are less fotunate than you
think of how blessed you are
of all the gifts you have
fight not,argue not
take your time to think
life is fast,waste it not
put the pieces together
life is for enjoying with loved ones
let ego's not clash
become one soul
live in paradise
satisfaction leads to a happy life.