poem on marriage

marriage is a bond of trust
cheat and you may lose it
nag and you will be resented
laugh and you will be sought
love and if it is selfless
that will seal it for ever

how to really love and be loved?

                     Please Help Me (save marriage)

What therefore god hath joined together let not man put asunder

                                                                              Psalm–ST. Mark. 10, 9

Emotional distress in strained relationships and marriages are increasing by the day. Modern technology has given man many a comfort in daily life. He has become more lazy and arrogant. Loved ones are no longer close to man. Instead, man finds pleasure in seeking other forbidden fruits.

When partners in a marriage spouses start to quarrel and if they are really young and immature, it is had to bring them back together. They may not see reason. In such situations, counseling and prayer may be of help.

Fighting for trivial causes must be avoided because marriage involves not only two persons who love each other but their families and friends also. The emotional breakdown is not worth it.

When a marriage is dissolved it brings forth a lot of problems like dislocation, money matters etc. When these factors are looked into before dissolving a marriage, i.e. if the partners are wise enough to think of these before calling it quits, then they will realize that the cause of the fight is silly and not worthy of any sacrifice. And they will compromise.

Aggravating a problem must be avoided by close relatives and friends. When advising a couple we must be careful not to put oil in a raging fire, i.e. we should not antagonize the partners. Otherwise they may take wrong decisions.

Sometimes a fight if slept over a day or two will be forgotten soon. So it is better not to fight back unnecessarily and create chaos and confusion and a disturbed house. My mother-in-law always says when my husband and I quarrel that she will not interfere when we seek her advice because according to her a husband and wife will fight one day and love the next day. So if she were to take sides, she would be the fool. I took this advice from her and more and keep my mouth shut, zip it up when my husband tries to provoke me with words or actions. After some time, he gives up when I do not react and soon the whole matter is forgotten.

Real love will stand the test of time, so give up your ego and pride, love unconditionally, even if your partner is not worth it because they will one day realize your value. Why jump from frying pan to another fire?

love and harmony

When there is harmony in the home, there will be order in the nation. When there is order in the nation, there will be peace in this world.-baba

Love truly your patner and you will never be sorry, because love grows when you give more.

Love is the factor that unites a man and a woman in marriage. It is not an obligation; it is an expression of our inner feelings. When you are in love, there is no duality. For love to be pure and everlasting, we must clear the weeds of ego, greed, selfishness and suspicion. If we succeed in loving thus, our married life will never develop any problems and we will never have troubles.   

In most divorces, the main cause of rift has been misunderstanding and lack of commitment among partners. When the people involved have not completely understood each other and enter into a relationship, storms will brew after a short time. Just like their impulsive marriage, their behavior will also be impulsive which could lead to fights and heated arguments if the partner is not of an understanding nature.

Lack of commitment is a major issue. If partners think of marriage as a convenience based platform, they will not be fully and completely dedicated to the partner which would mean that they will go wayward if they are given a chance, resulting in divorce or separation. A marriage should not be considered as an object that can be bought as and when one likes from a market. A marriage involves two humans with emotions, [humans must not be treated like a robot], sometimes, children [who will be emotionally disturbed if their habitat is questioned] and society. All these factors must be carefully considered before jumping into a relationship and later declaring it to be most stupid action ever done.

Love is an emotion felt deep in the heart. At first good looks and infatuation may have been the cause, but later on if the partners have deep understanding and unselfish care for each other, the relationship develops into a strong bond and will stay forever which no flirt or scandal can break. You can feel your love surge when you are away from your partner. Such love should be developed where the partners are completely interdependent and trust each other fully.

True love between partners will spread and infect the children also who will be nurtured in this lovely atmosphere. They in turn will be responsible partners and parents, thus helping society to be more or less civilized. But during these modern days, commitment, true love and unselfish behavior seems to have vanished  thus causing divorces and rifts in relationships and marriages and thereby causing mental stress to the people involved.   

Try to adjust and resolve any problems because life is meant to enjoyed, not to be wasted by dwelling over problems present or past. Love yourself, your lover, your children, your friends and relatives. Forget grudges of past, because nobody is perfect including you and adjust. Start to love this very moment, it is still not too late.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

Stay and save your marriage

Has your marriage been rough of recent? Do you feel like giving up? Don't! 

Stay put and save your marriage. Do not quit easily. Giving up before you even try is a sign of weakness. Don’t think that you can’t revive your marriage. You may not realize it, but every human has got mental power and if harnessed and used in a proper manner, it can change your lives forever.

The first step is to convince yourself that you are an important person whether or not anybody accepts or ridicules you. Nobody has any right to treat you like an animal. When you give confidence to your soul, you will not henceforth suffer any more abuse. It works.

It has taken time, money, emotions and effort to form a relationship with your partner. So do not let trivial matters upset your relationship which was once filled with love. Try to revive the same love that once filled your heart.

Conflicts occur because partners do not agree on many matters. But instead of arguing and separating, try to solve problems by consulting and seeking advice from elders. Their lifetime of experience must not be treated lightly.

Children should be brought up in an environment of love. Consider your children’s future before jumping to decisions. A boy must have his own father‘s proximity when growing up. Likewise a girl must have her mother’s support during hr teenage years. Before parting try to think of their well being and give it one more try.

Selfish motives and thoughts are impediments in a marriage. Try to remove selfish thoughts and desires because they make one egocentric. Love is lost when one thinks of only one’s own aims and ends. One drop of poison spoils a glass of water. Likewise, a selfish thought will spoil a marriage, a beautiful relationship.

Lack of spending time with each other can cause a rift in relationships. Other interests or friends may take your place if you do not show the same amount of proximity and love toward your partner. So is not prevention better than cure?

Emotions and love play an important role in married life. Try to show more love and be true in your feelings toward your partner. Superficial love is soon seen through.

Last, but not least partners should complement each other. They should rely on each other’s support and love so that whenever a problem arises, their marriage will not fail.

Marriage should be treated with respect and responsibility because it forms the backbone of society. Partners should adjust to the maximum before calling it quits. So try to save your marriage, please. Remember, marriages are made in heaven. Bring back the love that was once present and live happily once more.

save my love

When there is harmony in the home, there will be order in the nation. When there is order in the nation, there will be peace in this world.-baba

Love is the factor that unites a man and a woman in marriage. It is not an obligation; it is an expression of our inner feelings. When you are in love, there is no duality. For love to be pure and everlasting, we must clear the weeds of ego, greed, selfishness and suspicion. If we succeed in loving thus, our married life will never develop any problems and we will never have troubles.   

In most divorces, the main cause of rift has been misunderstanding and lack of commitment among partners. When the people involved have not completely understood each other and enter into a relationship, storms will brew after a short time. Just like their impulsive marriage, their behavior will also be impulsive which could lead to fights and heated arguments if the partner is not of an understanding nature.

Lack of commitment is a major issue. If partners think of marriage as a convenience based platform, they will not be fully and completely dedicated to the partner which would mean that they will go wayward if they are given a chance, resulting in divorce or separation. A marriage should not be considered as an object that can be bought as and when one likes from a market. A marriage involves two humans with emotions, [humans must not be treated like a robot], sometimes, children [who will be emotionally disturbed if their habitat is questioned] and society. All these factors must be carefully considered before jumping into a relationship and later declaring it to be most stupid action ever done.

Love is an emotion felt deep in the heart. At first good looks and infatuation may have been the cause, but later on if the partners have deep understanding and unselfish care for each other, the relationship develops into a strong bond and will stay forever which no flirt or scandal can break. You can feel your love surge when you are away from your partner. Such love should be developed where the partners are completely interdependent and trust each other fully.

True love between partners will spread and infect the children also who will be nurtured in this lovely atmosphere. They in turn will be responsible partners and parents, thus helping society to be more or less civilized. But during these modern days, commitment, true love and unselfish behavior seems to have vanished  thus causing divorces and rifts in relationships and marriages and thereby causing mental stress to the people involved.   

Try to adjust and resolve any problems because life is meant to enjoyed, not to be wasted by dwelling over problems present or past. Love yourself, your lover, your children, your friends and relatives. Forget grudges of past, because nobody is perfect including you and adjust. Start to love this very moment, it is still not too late.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

Life Is Love Share It

Love for love's sake. Love is the most warm emotion in life. 

Love is the cause of creation of life. Two persons become one, two souls merge because of love and this brings forth happiness in the mind. Life is meant to be shared. What happiness will we have if we live in an island of our own? It is only when we connect with people that we feel at home.

Home is where the heart is. Married persons or those involved in a relationship should never make the following mistakes if they want to be happy forever with their partners.

They are:

1. Taking partners for granted and not giving them full attention- don’t make the mistake of ignoring partner once settled because marriage is like a tender sapling which needs utmost care and protection till it has reached a certain maturity level.
2. Flirting-even if your partner is magnanimous and open hearted, their heart will pain if you give more than necessary attention to unwanted people. Try to avoid flirting if you really love your partner.
3. Arguing- nobody till date has ever won an argument properly. Even if self declaring to be the winner, the other person will have grudges against you, so never argue with your partner. It will only pull you apart. If you want your partner to accept your view, try to speak kindly and encourage him or her to clarify his point of view, slowly he or she will accept yours and both of you can come to a consensus.
4. Give up exorbitant desires- try to live with what you have, give up irrational desires and be satisfied and content with what God has given you. Try not to look up, but compare your life with those who are less lucky than you and you will realize that you are better off. Excessive desires make you hungry for more and less patient leaving you stressed and unhappy. This could affect your marriage.
5. Not spending time together more- most people spend their time in other pursuits like social networking etc. ignoring their near and dear. While society is a must it does not mean that one should be addicted to it day and night.
6. Addictions- The partners should always be on the lookout for snares like addiction. Do not let your partner be controlled by any form of addiction because you may lose your position in his or her heart, let not that happen. Be brave to oppose this trait. Prevention is better than cure.

There are so many more points to be chewed and followed if you want to make your marriage work. Love unconditionally and that is the secret of a real marriage. In my married life I have gone through many rough times and there were days when I was left in tears most of the time. Only patience and support from God and my mother has helped me through.

Love for love’s sake,

Do stop to think before making a mistake

Life is to be enjoyed, so smile

Does not cost, will take you miles

Have a pure heart

It will give a head start

Express your love often

Will increase your married life by multiples of ten.

are you crying?

Why are you crying lately most of the time? Where is the love that was so magical now? What has happened to your relationship that you are quarrelling and crying most of the time?

A serious problem may be underlying beneath which if untreated could cause in break of relationship. Lack of understanding between partners could be the first cause. Difference of opinions could cause fights. Remember that marriage is a union, not a platform to debate or argue. Love should be true and unselfish, and then problems will not rise. The basis for arguments is the factor that wants are not satisfied, when wants or desires are not satisfied, then grudges surface and heated words are spoken. Words if blurt out cannot be taken back and will remain in a corner of the mind till it surfaces again in another fight. During such moments, heart aches like never before and a rift occurs mentally. If possible, try to adjust by spending time together and sort out priorities.

Another problem is flirting. The partner’s wayward behavior often destroys a relationship. This kind of situation creates anger and confusion. One way to overcome this phase could be to bring back love instead of giving up. Patience pays, so wait and try to love the partner more and behave as if you are not really affected or bothered by the situation. One of the greatest drawbacks is nagging, if you nag your partner always, then surely he or she will be put off. So do not pester, have a little bit of patience. Remember slow and steady wins the race. If you observe happily married couples of many years, you will see that they complement each other, but this was not achieved in one day.

Try to be realistic in life. Expecting the heaven when you enter into a marriage and then when reality strikes you in the face could upset the mind and sudden outbursts could cause fights. Before committing, it is advisable to have a long talk about life and what both the partners want out of this relationship, whether they are really going to stay put in the marriage or just having a trial and error method. Maturity and love should form the foundation of a marriage, not infatuation or other factors. If both the partners are mature and adjusting, then rest assure the marriage will stand the test of time, no matter what the obstacles might be.

True love means unselfishness. When partners marry, love and not other factors like money or fame should be the criteria. Remember the story of the Gift of the Magi. If true love is present, then flaws will be overlooked and mistakes shall be lovingly corrected.

So be patient, give time and think hard about solutions before leaping to conclusions or decisions. Remember what factors attracted you in the first place and try to bring back the same kind of feelings by spending more time together. Nothing is impossible. Every problem has a solution, try at least a few times to solve any misunderstanding and convince yourself that you can save your relationship. Live happily ever after.